Saturday, October 13, 2012

Garden Wars

So today we decided to tear up the garden.
Apparently our carrots really thrived in there....
On the plus side, we had insane tomato and squash crops and we never lifted a finger for that garden!

Ok so Kyle was actually the one to tear up the garden.
I had much more important things to do.
I declared war on the host of spiders emerging from the garden.

No joke, I killed AT LEAST 30 spiders.  And they were NOT tiny spiders either. The spiders and I, we are mortal enemies.  There would be no survivors.

I stood guard around the empty garden with a can of Raid waiting for the spiders to flee their earthy home and then I sprayed the crap out of them.  I had to wait for them to actually leave the garden because, hello! Poison!  But really I would have rather lost the entire garden by pouring toxic waste in there just to destroy them all at once.

Kyle was not pleased with my methods.

What he does not understand is this:
1.  Squishing spiders with your foot is super gross
2.  Spiders may live outside, but when winter comes, they don't just lie down and die.  No.  They find every tiny hole into your house, creep their way into your underwear drawer and bite you when you least expect it.
3.  Tiny spiders turn into big spiders who have a bagillion babies who turn into big spiders who find every tiny hole into your house, creep their way into your underwear drawer and bite you when you least expect it.
4.  I will never not be terrified of spiders.
5.  There will be no spider survivors.


Dear spiders,
Tell your friends.

1 comment:

It Started With a Wink said...

die spiders!!! you should know that my code for leaving this comment includes the word ants